Happy Birthday

Happy 43rd Birthday to me.  Jack and I got another bug last week so we haven't felt great but tonight we had a lovely dinner with Jack's Nanni and my aunt and uncle.  

Here's a picture of my beautiful flowers.

May 19, 2012: Mommy and Jack

I think my immune system is still down because I seem to be getting sick quite frequently and it's driving me crazy.  Just when I get back to the gym and try strength training, I get another cold or sore throat or whatever is going around.  So, I lie low and start over again when I can.  Some good news is, I think I'm getting some feeling back in my abdominal area, especially around my "new" belly button.  Deep inside I can feel the scar tissue, which are almond size bits and pieces.  I may try acupuncture again or some other therapies to try and smooth it out.  Any quick or swift move still takes my breath away but I am able to carry Jack once again if he wants me to hold him and I have so missed this.

I had decided to take a hiatus from doctor appointments and now we are already mid-May and I have to get back into it.  I meet with my gynecologist next week to get a plan in action.  I also have to schedule my next EUS (Esophageal ultrasound) to check my pancreas.  Happy to report another colonoscopy isn't necessary until next year.  My breast surgeon gave me an 8 week break until the last part of my reconstruction which is the tattoos and it's time, but I'm not in any hurry for this right now.  

I'm 8 months from my first surgery and 3 months from my second.  My body continues to change.  I'm not sure sure how to feel since body image isn't one of my strong suits.  I dress in my old clothes that now hang on me.  I feel rather homely.  Mom called me 'Poor Pitiful Pearl' and gave me some shopping money to go buy some new clothes and stop bitching about it.  I swear I don't even know where to start.  I did finally get two new bras, yeah me!  That was uncomfortable getting measured and all, but it had to be done.  I'm still just so uncomfortable with how I feel and how I look.  It's a process.  I will not let this get me down but nobody can rush me into any of this.  I just have to go at my own pace.  Taurus; we hate change!

So this is my update.....I can't believe we have almost 4000 hits here.  I've met a few more women via twitter that are in my same shoes.  I hope we can continue to support one another and educate each other about this #BRCA2 gene.  When people say that BRCA patients choose to have these surgeries, I ask you, is it really elective surgery if cancer is the alternative?  Surgery is the only cancer prevention we have.  I wish more people could understand this and not be offended by words like, "previvor."  I am a changed woman; we all are.  Bless all my BRCA sisters out there.

Sincerely,  Janeen

    

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

HELLO MOM'S!

I just wanted to extend a Mother's Day greeting to all of you mom's out there who are following our blog.  With all of our trials and tribulations we ladies can stand tall and give ourselves a pat on the back for the incredible work we do.  A woman's day is never done, but I hope this Sunday each and everyone of you will take a moment for yourself and give yourself credit for doing the hardest job in the world, that being a MOM.  It is also the most gratifying job but we often lose ourselves in the care giving of others. If you are one of the mom's who has undergone multiple surgeries this year ( or even one ) be patient, the old you will resurface again.  You simply need more time and our prayers and thoughts are still with you.  Remember how blessed you are while eating the burnt pancakes, soggy cereal and cold coffee on Sunday morning.  All these efforts come from a loving place so put a smile on your pretty little face and know we are all celebrating in the same way with you.

God Bless Us All!
Barb ( Janeen's Mom )

Amazing

It has been quite a while since I have posted anything.  But there is something I would like to share with all of our followers.  When I started this blog I had no idea how it would do nor did I know where it would go.  My original idea was to let Janeen, along with family and friends follow us along a path that was both foreign and very scary.  I have said before it ended up being very cathartic for me and equally as cathartic for Janeen once she was told the blog existed.  I had always hoped Janeen would eventually meet through this blog, other women who were facing the same decisions that Janeen was facing and women who shared her anger along with her fears.  This has happened and continues to happen on somewhat of a regular basis.  When she shares the stories of these women we have never met and probably never will meet, we cry and immediately I say a prayer for that person.  These women are all in different phases of their journey but they are able to tell each other how they handled their mastectomy's or maybe one gal opted to have her hysterectomy first then remove her breasts.  No matter what the order of the surgeries each one has chosen, there is a common denominator and that is testing positive for BRCA 2.  I cannot stress enough how common this scenario is and still there are so many of you out there have never ever heard of this gene.  I will never understand why more doctors do not test for this genetic component and why insurance companies refuse to pay for this simple blood test that is outrageously expensive.  This is so wrong on so many levels and my heart goes out to each and everyone who has had to make very difficult decisions, in order to save their lives while still having to fight the insurance companies for compensation at the same time.  Unless their are drastic changes in the medical arena, women will just sit and wait for cancer to attack and ultimately kill them.  There is a lady in Georgia, she has breast cancer and she has opted for a double mastectomy.  Her doctor will not do the surgery unless she is tested for BRAC 1 and BRCA 2 gene.  Her insurance will not pay for the test and she cannot afford to pay for the test.  So she just sits and waits. I pray for this woman daily.

So, to all of you ladies who have met my daughter through this blog or twitter please keep in touch.  You are helping each other more than you probably realize at this moment and the beauty of these relationships that are forming you all know exactly how each one of you feels and that has to be comforting for all of you.  Janeen's next surgery will be the hysterectomy but no date has been set as of this posting.  She is once again due to have her pancreas and other organs screened and check ups are coming up again soon.  I realize all of you are so sick of doctor's offices but hang in there ladies one day the road you now travel will be a distant memory.

God bless you all and your families and this mom is so happy you have found each other.

Love,
Barb ( Janeen's Mom :)